For The Love of Wrath
by SilverShark00
Summary: Sometimes, we cannot keep ourselves from what we want. Whether it's something horrifying, or something beautiful. Something dark, or something forbidden. For the love of wrath, Squalo would go to hell and back. But wrath has many faces. And, he did not expect his boss to be one of them.
1. Chapter 1

This is my first Fanfiction ^^ I have been writing since I could pick up a pencil, so I hope you all enjoy.

I am a HUGE XS fan, and I truly believe that it is the only possible boyxboy paring in KHR. I try to write the characters IN character, and will ALWAYS do so…

Notes: Other than the obvious paring, there may be some differences in the story line from the actual Anime/Manga. This story is rated M for a reason….Swearing, adult situations, and nonconsensual sex.

**For the Love of Wrath**

For a man to contradict his entire existence for living, takes something powerful. Something that can will a man into a direction he never expected. A direction that may not have been the obvious choice in the past. Some may call it love. But, what of such a weak word? Only fools fell in love. Its power creeps up into your body and through your soul. And, once you realize it's there, it is already too late. It has eaten you alive. Made you lose your focus. Your world spins upside down, leaving you to find the way.

We all have our demons. However, for Superbi Squalo, his demon was all too real.

They had all lost this war. Although, the word "all" had been used lightly in Xanxus' presence. Unless you didn't mind a bottle of scotch or whisky being thrown at your head. In Xanxus' words, the scum that worked for him had lost. But not him. Such a battle had given an unfair advantage to the Vongola brat. Luck. Luck was all it was. Even their backup plans had failed. Inside, all of the Varia were broken. None of which would ever show it. Lussuria had shed a few tears of pain, but quickly subsided his failure with cooking in a small attempt to boost the spirits of the others as well. Bel had retreated to his room feeling somewhat successful. He, at least, won his individual battle. Levi had shammed himself to a dark corner in the Varia castle, where little light shown through. A tear of frustration may have been visible if more moonlight could invade its way in.

As for Squalo, he had never felt so weak in his life. He had to fucking scream at the fucking Bronco to let him leave with the boss even though he knew he was risking his life doing so. Most of his bandages lay loosely now. The blood from some of his stitches had stopped seeping through a few days prior. He removed his coat, so that he stands in his semi-lit room with just his boots and leather pants on. The bandages made it impossible to see his bare chest as he gazed in the mirror. _Shame_ he thought. He slowely raised both his hands to graze them over his chest. He was still sore. Still broken. Still pondering in his head if he should go see the boss. Squalo figured that he'd rather die by his boss' hand than at the hands of some Vongola brat. He ran his right hand through his soft locks of hair. A reminder of the promise he made to Xanxus flashed before him. A promise that was damaged from the very beginning.

So that decided it.

The room was red. Always a tint of red. The king size bed, located in the right corner of the room, always had black sheets on it. Xanxus' chair lay against the middle of the wall to the left of the bed. He sat upon it like a king. His hard gaze could kill anyone that wasn't use to it. When Squalo entered the room, he knew that fire would be on him. Seeing through him as if he wasn't there. Xanxus had his legs crossed, with a glass of whisky in his right hand, elbow placed on the arm rest. He was still bloody. Still heated from the battle lost.

Squalo entered slowly.

"Boss…"

No answer.

"Boss I…"

"Hmm." Xanxus stood from his perch swiftly, leaving his unfinished class of whisky on the arm rest. He walked slowly towards Squalo, eyes never leaving his figure.

"You failed me, scum." Xanxus was now only a few inches away from Squalo's face. Squalo tilted his head down slightly to take a break from the hard gaze he was receiving.

"Voi, I-"

"Don't speak. I am talking." Xanxus kept his voice low, but firm. "You have failed me. Along with the rest of the trash in this god forsaken place." Squalo could smell the Whisky on his breath. "You are no good to me anymore."

Squalo looked up as he heard the safety click off on one of Xanxus' X-guns. "I always knew it." Xanxus voice was starting to raise in volume.

"Knew what boss?" Squalo still held together well. He had been in deep shit with the boss before, but had a feeling this was the icing on the cake.

An evil smirk cracked over Xanxus' face. "scum. I know everything. My intuition is above perfection." Xanxus helped one of his guns to Squalo's forehead.

Squalo starred at him with astonishment. He couldn't be talking about…no…nononononono. This can't be. Squalo thought he had done such a good job of hiding his feelings. Any type of caring feeling was weak. Weakweakweakweak. An illusion created to make people drive themselves crazy over another human being.

Squalo was quickly snapped out of his thoughts when he felt a hand grab a handful of his hair and push him against the door with a loud thud. Xanxus pressed himself against him, and spoke softly and cruely into his ear. His gun still in his other hand against Squalo's jaw, now.

"You pathetic shark. Succumbing to weak emotions? Your nothing more than the scum of the Earth, you know that? You fucking want me. And I've always known it."

All Squalo could do at this point, was close his eyes and unwillingly focus on the hot breath from Xanxus ghosting over his ear and neck. Fuck. Had he made it that obvious?

"Your fucking hair. Your undying loyalty. Tell me Squalo." Xanxus yanked Squalo's head up to finally face him. "Do you think about me at night? Do you think about what would happen if I found out and decided I needed a quick screw? Fantasize about me fucking you in the shower, hm?" Xanxus' voice was slowly getting louder and louder. "I fuck girls. GIRLS. And I get what I want. Does that make you jealous? How I love to be inside of them instead of you?"

Squalo tried his best to hide the blush on his face, and to look away from the intensifying gaze. "VOII! What would you know?! And, so what?! Its not like it affects you!"

Xanxus' grin became even more devious as he yanked the Shark, and made him follow towards the bed. "I'm in need of a good fuck tonight. I guess you'll do. After all, you're no better than those whores I use."

Reality hit Squalo, as he felt his head hit the pillow harshly, and before he could move, the older Italian man was above him, pressing his weight on the shark allowing no escape. Xanxus undid his tie, and bound Squalo's hands to the bedpost. Squalo had never struggled so much in his life. Fear was finally beginning to hit him. He had wanted Xanxus. But, never like this. He was way too angry, and more than likely extremely drunk.

"VOII! Stop this! Stop!" Squalo continued to struggle.

"I thought this was what you wanted." Xanxus cooed as he ghosted his hands down Squalo's chest and bandages. Once he made it to his leather pants, he all but ripped them off the Shark.

"XANXUS! STOP THIS!"

"You're hard, scum." Xanxus' evil laugh filled the room. He then proceeded to rip Squalo's boxers off as well. He sat back on his haunches to watch the shark thrash about while he slowly unbuttoned his pants and pulled out his impressive and hard length.

"All you deserve is pain." Xanxus laid back on top of Squalo straddling him.

"VOII! STOP! AHH!"

Xanxus grabbed a hold of Squalo's length and stroked it dry, mercilessly. Up and down, at an unbearable pace. "You like this, huh? You sick Shark."

"VOII!" Squalo's voice was becoming hoarse and weak. Tears were beginning to well at the corners of his eyes. "STOP! IT'S TOO MUCH!"

Xanxus latched onto Squalo's neck and and drew the sharks blood. Squalo hear his sick laughter echoing throughout the room. "Trash. This is what you get for failing me. If you think I'm going to let you come, you really are insane." At that, Xanxus squeezed Squalo's member tightly and continuously rubbed his thumb over his tip.

"Ahh….nggnnn…Please stop. Fuck."

Keeping his hand on Squalo's member, Xanxus hoisted one of the sharks legs upward using his other hand and pressed his body forward so that Squalo was practicly helpless. Xanxus grin said it all. Red eyes glaring right at Squalo's silver ones. Squalo's voice became so low, that Xanxus barely heard it.

"No….No…No…Xanxus. I….Don't do this to me."

"What better way to hurt you scum, then to screw your emotions up? I don't give a shit about you. And I'm going to enjoy your screams as I fuck you endlessly."

Squalo used the last of his strength in a futile attempt to free himself. But, Xanxus wasn't going to give in. He aligned himself at Squalo's tight enternce. Time seemed to stand still for the helpless Shark, as he remembered the promise he made to Xanxus. To follow him endlessly to hell and back. To be his right-hand man.

He knew that he was not gay. Squalo had never felt emotions for another man. He had never really fancied a woman either, really. But there was just something about Xanxus. His presence. His existence. His rage and power that drove him to be the 10th he will never become. He liked the thought of being owned by him. Being completely possessed by him and only him. His beautiful dark skin, complemented by even darker scars. His pitch black hair and dark red eyes. He was a masterpiece in Squalo's eyes.

All of his thoughts were completely abandoned, when Xanxus rammed all the way into him. Squalo had never felt so much pain in his life.

"I can't wait to watch your face." Xanxus cooed, as he licked from Squalo's neck up to his cheek, and began to move at an ungodly fast pace, in and out, in and out.

"AAAHAAA! STOP! GOD, FUCKING STOP!" In and out, in and out.

"SCUM. I knew you were good for something." In and out, in and out.

Squalo felt as if he was going to lose consciousness. He felt something welling inside of him. Something he needed to let out. Something had shattered.

"STOOOPPP!" And with that, for the first time in his life, Squalo allowed tears to stream down his face.

In and out, in and out.

The endless fucking did not stop. Squalo's tightness was making Xanxus climb closer to his orgasm.

That was until Xanxus got a good look at his sharks face.

His evil smirk, turned to a line, and he stalled inside of Squalo.

Tears? He had not expected his right hand man to…cry? What sick world had Xanxus entered for this event to occur?

"Please….stop…let me go." Squalo's voice was shaky, but stern. "I hate you…you…shitty fucking boss. All you do is take. And I still stood by you."

In Xanxus' mind, two things happened. He reminded himself that he did not care about the Shark under him. He did not care that he was in unbearable pain. Squalo had become slick inside, and Xanxus knew it was because of the blood now rushing out. He could feel it. The second thing being processed in Xanxus' mind was the fact that he NEVER expected to ever even fuck his commander. What gave him this idea? This all had to be because due to the Whisky.

It was then that Xanxus found himself raising off of Squalo and slowly pulling out and undoing his bound wrists. Xanxus knew in the back of his mind that he did not feel drunk. Yet, he felt as if some of his control was lost. He had acted out of rage before, but this sick idea…this was a new kind of rage. A kind of rage that he found himself wanting Squalo to take part in. But why..?

THUD.

Xanxus snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Squalo fall of the bed. Helplessly attempting to run out of the room. Blood following him where ever he stumbled. Xanxus froze at the sight. His right-hand man…His commander…his…dare he say it. Friend. In a state of pure fear and pain. Trying to run from him.

When Squalo made it to the door, he'd not dare look back. A simple pause said it all, as he slammed the door behind him as he walked out. He never heard the mellow "Squalo" escape his bosses lips just moments before.

Squalo laid motionless on his bed. Not giving a damn about the blood, nor his half naked body. He felt safe under the covers. Door locked. Lights out. Darkness. Where he felt he belonged. This way, no one could see the tears he shed that night. Nor, the helpless "why's" he quietly whispered to himself. His already disheveled body was now broken emotionally. A way of pain Squalo was convinced he would never feel. Had he fallen for the devil himself? Xanxus really didn't care about anything. Nothing. He had hoped that he at least considered him a useful commander. Maybe even a good acquaintance? He liked to think they were friends. But, that may have been asking too much. It really was true that he had no heart. No soul. No feelings. And that made the tears flow more and more.

He had no idea that Xanxus sat outside his bedroom door all night.

Fini :D First fanfaction. Comments/critiques are always welcomed. As far as im concerned ,all fanfictions are a bit out of character xP so I apologize for that! There IS a second part to this coming next week. Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Final Chapter…I hope you all enjoy ^^ and thank you so much for the reviews! I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the first. I had a little inspiration from a song, which I'm sure some of you will identify right away :D All credit to the anime and song always goes at the end of my completed stories.

Same warnings as the first chapter. With a little bit of implied Dino, which can be interpreted as you wish ;)

**Chapter 2**

It had been a nightmare. Right? A dream gone bad after too much alcohol? But, Squalo knew he had not drank last night. He remembered the smell of Whisky that was not from his own breath. Then the pain hit him.

No…that nightmare was all too real.

Everything hurt. From the scars on his heart to the bruises on his wrists. Not to mention the embarrassing pain running from his bottom all the way up his spine. Squalo would show no expression to the rest of the insane people he lived with. Only in the shower did he squint a little as he tried to wash off the horrid memory.

_Those tears had been a lie _he thought to himself as he dressed at a slow pace. Black sleek boots reaching just below his knees. Accompanied by grey leather pants, and a simple white button up shirt. Fuck the tie. Today was a day of recovery. So, he let his button up stay untucked, leaving just his hair to be brushed. Sitting was a bitch, so the shark figured he'd keep himself busy today, to help ease the pain.

He wasn't broken, oh no. Just bent out of shape a little. And stronger. Xanxus could die for all he cared. Fuck, he'd do it by his own sword given the chance.

Squalo popped about 5 advil before walking to his door and exiting his room. He appeared normal to the naked eye. No limp. No stressed expression. No emotion. Maybe that was too much of a give away, though. Squalo was always loud and obnoxious. Varia was never a quiet, peaceful place.

Upon entering the living room, he found everyone already sitting or eating. Keeping to themselves.

Except for Xanxus. _Good_ Squalo thought. _I hope he rots in that fucking chair._

"Voi, what's for breakfast?" Squalo asked with as much confidence as he could muster for such a simple sentence. Bel answered from his lazy spot on the couch.

"Ushishi, the boss said you're not allowed to eat until you have a little visit with him." It was obvious how excited Bel was to say this to the shark.

This couldn't be happening. Something had snapped.

"VOOII, you're fucking with me right?! NO! No, that's bullshit! You tell that shitty fucking, perverted, boss that I'm DONE. If he tries to stop me, I'll slit his throat!"

Everyone in the room was completely taken aback by the angry shark. Silence took over. And Squalo's voice took over.

It had all come out too fast. Squalo was no longer thinking. Such a simple sentence had broken his mask of concentration. A storm was brewing, and this particular one was like no other. His extremely short temper had gotten the best of him yet again.

Squalo walked as fast as his body could allow over to the sitting prince on the couch and pulled him up by the collar. Secret eyes meeting grey, broken ones.

Squalo spoke through his teeth. A low yet scary tone. Something only close Varia members have ever seen. A silent evil that rest within the back of Squalo's mind. A wrath that had been planted in his mind long ago.

"We are all sick, twisted Mafioso. Yeah. But that peace of lazy shit that sits on his fucking perch like a king? No. He's worse than the devil himself. He's eaten my soul. Leave before he eats yours."

And that would mark the first time that Squalo ever gave advice to anyone. His evident anger all being caused by a simple breakfast comment. Or maybe it was something more all together.

Bel was then violently thrown back onto the couch, a smile still plastered on his face. Squalo turned away to walk back to his room.

He was starting to break physically, for a small limp was evident now.

"Ushishishi did Squ-chan have a rough night last night?"

Squalo stopped in his tracks. Everything and everyone seemed to stop. Turning on his heels and pulling out a small knife from his left boot, Bel's throat was his text target. If it weren't for a strong hand grabbing his wrist a millisecond before impact.

Red.

Deep red eyes met Squalo's now completely cracked and disheveled ones, as he looked up to face Xanxus leaning over the couch. His usual attire consisting of black pants, black boots, and a loosely worn button up. Accompanied by his jacket on his shoulders, of course.

"Oh yeah ushishishi did I forget to tell you? Xanxus was in the kitchen."

And at that, Bel slipped out from beneath the two powerful men, and exited the room. The others had already been smart enough to leave moments ago.

With eyes still locked, and Squalo writst still in Xanxus' firm grip, he dare not move. No, that was a death wish. It was not fear, oh no. It was called strategy. How would he get out of this one?

"Squalo."

And that would mark a second first that day. The first time Squalo heard his name roll out of Xanxus' mouth. It was then accompanied by a moment of complete silence. Squalo noticed Xanxus' grip loosening, so he took it upon himself to yank his arm away. However, as quickly as Xanxus' grip had loosened, it had tightened once again. And this time, tighter.

"VOII! I'll kill you! Let go!"

"Don't threaten me trash, shut up and listen."

"No. No, you don't own me anymore! Fuck you! I'll make sure you rot in hell!" Squalo's voice could be heard all throughout Varia headquarters. He was doing a swell job of keeping his tone strong and powerful.

"We're all going to hell. Might as well make the best of it." And at that, Xanxus stepped over the couch and took hold of Squalo's other arm.

Squalo now found himself between the wall and wrath once again. Arms pinned at his sides.

"No. You will not do this again. " Squalo's voice was now low and cracking more and more by the second. "I'll rip your skin from your bones and fucking feed it to the sharks. Then maybe I'll go back to someone who actually gives a shit about my well being."

Xanxus' eyes seemed to burn more fierce at that comment.

"Who, Cavallone? I'll burn his pretty little face off. Then what of it, hm?"

"…you wouldn't fucking dare." Squalo did his best to meet his bosses eyes with the same intensity, but could barely muster any strength at all.

"Why did you cry last night?"

Squalo's eye widened at the comment. Xanxus was mocking him now?

"Fuck you."

"Answer my question."

"Fuck off! I did not cry!"

Xanxus pulled Squalo quickly towards him, then slammed him back into the wall, pulling the Shark's hands above his head now.

"I'll ask you one more time. Why did you-"

"MAYBE I should ask YOU why. Why the fuck you…you…"

Xanxus pressed even closer to Squalo now, forcing him to look right into his eyes.

"An answer for an answer, scum."

Squalo would die before letting his pride slip away. Life was not worth living without it. But for Xanxus, he knew deep down inside he'd give anything for him. His pride…his left hand…his life. A contradiction indeed. It took two simple words.

"..it hurt."

And at that, Xanxus laughed. The bastard fucking laughed! Still pinning Squalo, Xanxus quickly pulled himself together to gaze at grey eyes that were completely shattered to pieces now.

"You've endured worse pain than that. Oh, what did I break your little heart?" The sarcasm was so evident, that Squalo could almost taste it.

"VOII maybe you should go fuck yourself and see how it feels!"

"Ha, I'm not uke material, trash." Squalo's eyes widened. He could feel a cold sweat forming on his forehead. The heat between their bodies was beginning to climb.

"Let me go. I'm done with this god forsaken place."

"No."

At this point, Squalo didn't even bother to struggle. In his mind, he was better off dead. And who better to do it, than the man who stole his heart.

"Just fucking kill me. Common, I know that's what you want. I failed you."

"You're no good to me dead."

"VOOII you really seemed like you wanted to kill me last night!"

"Has your shitty mind ever thought of the possibility that hate is all I know? How about I freeze you for eight years, and see how you feel? Better yet, why don't I put dark, red scars all over your body?"

Squalo was stunned for two reasons; One being the fact that he hadn't died yet, and the other being that this was probably the longest conversation he had ever had with Xanxus.

"I only know how to hate you." Xanxus lips were now centimeters away from Squalo. That simple line would follow Squalo for the rest of his life. The diagnosis of only knowing how to hate for the rest of ones life was hard to understand. Squalo would only be hated by the one he returned his undying love for.

"Boss…" Squalo trailed off.

"Don't fucking talk. You pissed me off last night. If I had lost you…"

Squalo couldn't believe what he had heard. Xanxus had trailed off and stopped talking. Maybe this was the first step in the right direction. Had Xanxus screwed his brains out purely because he almost LOST his right hand man? An act ment to be an act of passion gone wrong? Maybe it was the thought of losing his trusty shark and never knowing what could have been.

But we all know that shit is reserved for love stories.

Squalo's brain had now turned off. He found himself pressing forward and meeting the lips he had met once before. Xanxus did not pull back. In fact, he strengthened the attack on his sharks mouth. The temperature in the room appeared to have raised a whole 20 degrees. Xanxus let go of Squalo's hands and laced one strong arm through the promise his shark made to him what seemed like forever ago. Pulling with just the right amount of force. The other arm gripped roughly at Squalo's waist.

Their bodies were as close as they could possibly be. The kiss would have gone on forever, if air was not essential to live. Xanxus jerked Squalo's head up to stare directly into his eyes once more.

"I'll always hate you, trash. I hate your existence. So, if you do something stupid, I won't hesitate to end your life myself."

Squalo couldn't help but show a small smile. "got it, boss."

"Don't think I'm done with you either." Xanxus backed off slightly. "Be in my room by 8. Or you're dead." Xanxus turned quickly and fluidly, and proceeded to walk back into the kitchen.

And now the shark was alone in the tank. Still leaning against the wall. A small smile still visible on his face. Yeah, maybe everyone here was fucked up in the head. But Squalo was sure of one thing; revenge would come along with round two.

*** _fini_

I was thinking about writing about round two as an extra if enough people liked this ^^ Once again, thank you for the previous reviews. I love KHR and will be writing about other pairings and stories of my own sometime soon!

I do not own _Hitman reborn_ or _Just Give Me a Reason_ by P!nk (I would be impressed if anyone picked up the subtle line references within my story from the song. (:


	3. Update (sorta )

Sorry to disappoint 3 But this is only an update!

Round two is coming later tonight~~ Sorry I've been so busy~

I am also writing (and working on right now as well) an idea I had with the Evil Dead..for those that know the movie, I love you :D

And for those that know the movies well (There is the Evil Dead I and II)…they may know where I am going with this…

Props to those that know! there will be more on the update tonight….and thanks for all the reviews and loves on the story..its greatly appreciated!


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